just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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