This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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