"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
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His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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