I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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