My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
