I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize