Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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