So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
21 Millennials Confess The Most Awkward Way Someone Has Tried Hitting On Them
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
25 People Confess The Most Ignorant Thing Someone Has Ever Said To Them
Whats that? My new stripper name?
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY