I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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