can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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