Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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