Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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