you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize