Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
