I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
