whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize