went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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