Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize