Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
