I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
