sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
