Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
