Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
