Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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