just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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