oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
handjob tips. give me some.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
