I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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