Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
He felt like a one man threesome
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
All the doctor said was why
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
