I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
