Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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