No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
