I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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