i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
one might say we're banned from that church
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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