you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
