Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize