Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Randomize
