I want to walk on stilts...naked
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
