she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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