you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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