Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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