i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
