Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3pm strippers are depressing
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
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