Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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