that's an acceptable place to lick
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
so much tequila, so little girl.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize
