just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
