Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
