But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize
