It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.