Rock
Scissors
Fuck
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
