Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize