I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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